I'm coming to really dislike the word... and all that it stands for.
Last week, we had a really productive appointment with the therapist, assuming that by the word 'productive' you understand that she got really sassy and announced point-blank that the only reason she hadn't bitten me during a rage is that she hadn't thought of it.
Alternatively, productive might mean that I now know how to properly put my child in a therapeutic hold instead of just trying to make do... for the record, I had been pretty darn close the way I'd been doing it already. I just needed to be told to stick a pillow against my sternum because apparently I'm not intelligent enough to figure that one out myself. DUH, Sarah.
I also know what to do in case biting jumps to mind next time.
Oy and effing vey.
Either way, the therapist and I then discussed the whole
It's a bloody process.
Today we visited the psychiatrist, whom we hadn't seen since school began. The visit didn't encompass so much in the way of treatment as the diagnostic side of things. I'm trying to hold off on medication for as long as we can, until we can get as firm a diagnosis as possible. Plus, the psychiatrist is extremely reluctant to make certain diagnoses - pediatric bipolar disorder being one of them. I'm okay with that, too, but it means that I get to deal with more and more in the way of going through the diagnostic process. When we first visited, the doctor was hesitant to diagnose anything other than anxiety (generalized and separation), which means we tried Lexapro, which ended in ULTIMATE FAIL. Since then, he's watched and listened and tried to work out if there actually are any other diagnostic possibilities that fit her slew of symptoms other than bipolar disorder. Two sessions ago, he admitted the possibility of a mood disorder, NOS. Last time, he added depressive disorder to the list of probabilities. Today, though, he admitted he's pretty darn close to giving up the ghost and said that he really can't figure out anything else other than bipolar disorder, NOS.
Heh. Heheheheheheheheh. I have triumphed over the processing process!
I didn't actually want to win that one, though.
Anyway, because M2 isn't consistently up or down for days and days on end (she'll have two or three good days, then two or three bad, then another one or two good and another one or two bad), we're still holding off on formal medication. We're doubling her melatonin each evening, and M2 is going to keep a sleeping log, writing down the times she wakes up each night. If she's not consistently sleeping at night, the doctor wants to add some clonidine or trazodone and see if that helps. After that... well, after that we head to Lamictal, assuming she doesn't get extremely manic since Lamictal is primarily used for patients who tend toward the depressed side of things rather than the manic. I wouldn't be surprised, though, if the doctor actually begins to recommend medication soon rather than agreeing we should hold off... he tends to agree with the 'kindling' theory that young people who have untreated bipolar tend to become more difficult to treat over time. However, if she doesn't have bipolar, then maybe we could try another SSRI and see if she reacts as negatively as she did last time.
Mostly, it's all a crap shoot.
Sometimes even processing it takes too much effort.
Next time, a funnier post!