Contrary to what you might think, the title above has nothing to do with a fast-food restaurant or any of its ilk. It's a new medical acronym that I have just invented for the condition commonly known as "Mad Cow Disease."
Since apparently Oz reads this blog to discover the nature of my mood before he comes home, I figured fair warning was in order. After all, it isn't *ENTIRELY* his fault that I have MCD today. Mostly it's because I'm running on about 2-1/2 to 3 hours of sleep from last night, which is also not entirely Oz's fault because I'm about 98% sure that my lack of sleep was due to the fact that I ate Sonic mozzarella sticks at 10 p.m. and had a Pepsi at 6 p.m.
I'm not sure which one affected me more, but the one thing I *do* know is that I am immune to the supposed effects melatonin because 6 mg didn't do diddly-squat.
Didn't help that the &*#% cat kept stealing green beans out of the bowl in the kitchen and tossing them to the floor and then batting them around.
Didn't help that the dogs were barking their stupid heads off outside and making me have visions of shock collars used at maximum voltage.
Didn't help that my internal temperature was roughly 864 degrees from all the carbohydrates my body was trying to literally burn off and that I was still burning up after I turned down the thermostat five degrees. I thought it was only two degrees. That's what I get for thinking. And not that it mattered.
The eye mask that I got out of the freezer didn't help, either. I think it stayed cool for about five minutes. I was seriously burning up.
So when 2:08 rolled around and I was still awake, I knew I was going to be crabby this morning and there was not one darn thing I could do about it. I think I finally fell asleep sometime around 2:30 (since I go to bed around 12:30, this isn't has awful as you might think, but even so) and then the &*#% cat woke me up at 5 doing his green bean thing again - repeatedly - until 5:45-ish - and then the birds had the gall to wake up and start SINGING. Birds shouldn't sing until I'm up and moving. It should be a rule. I'm going to start a petition.
And *then* when I was just finally getting back to sleep again, Oz came in at 6:30 and woke me up... sort of... cause I had already heard his alarm go off and I couldn't get mad at him because I'd told him to get me up so I could water the garden before it got to be 864 degrees outside as opposed to inside my body. And then M2 got up at 7.
So after trying in vain to get her to go back to sleep which resulted in me getting more irritated by the second because my daughter has an external dialogue instead of an internal one and you can hear that from the living room even if she's in her room with the door shut, (and I was sleeping on the couch because sleeping with Oz was a ghost I gave up around 1)... I got up.
It's now 10:32 a.m. and I have done the following things today:
--Watered the garden
--Let the chicks out of the coop
--Gotten pissed because Oz pushed the latch so far back against the door that I canNOT get the door open to clean out the chicks' water, which irritates me. And I was going to tell him this when he called to see how my morning was going except that his boss beeped in and *that* was more important than *me* ranting, and he said he'd call me back but apparently he didn't mean it because it was shortly after 8 this morning when he called and even though I have one call that I missed because my phone has quit ringing when people call and just send them to voicemail and doesn't even show a missed call... it wasn't him and it's now 10:34 a.m. And yes, he's in trouble. And while I realize that when I called him two seconds ago to ask him a computer question, he did realize that he hadn't called me back... I'm still cranky. Sorry.
--Stripped and remade the beds that EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. in this house MADE this morning even though I asked every. single. person. in this house to strip their beds.
--Washed three loads of laundry and had a rant at M1 because I don't know what it is about him, but he can't manage to get a single meal into his stomach without wearing a good 25% of it on his clothes.
--Cleaned out a gerbil cage.
--Directed the boy to scrub his fish tank and help spray all the stains on his clothing.
--Fed and Zyrtec'd the children.
--Swept the kitchen floor and picked up the fur wads that have accumulated on the carpet in the last 24 hours because God forbid my house stay clean for more than 0.000003 seconds. It's not like anyone actually *helps* it stay clean.
--Gotten my squishy cow stomach stepped on by a cat while I'm typing this.
So clearly I am being productive and am about to actually go get dressed and brush my teeth and put on make-up so when I take the kids to swimming lessons, we can all pretend we're a nice, happy, normal family whose mother isn't running on severe sleep deprivation. 'Cause while I can run on four hours of sleep, anything less makes for One Mad Cow.