Tuesday, September 7, 2010

The Big Talk

M1 and I had The Big Talk the other day.

Not *THAT* big talk. 

We had *that* talk in May when he asked me point-blank how babies got into their mommies' tummies and wanted a Final Answer.  I wanted to Phone a Friend, but apparently I'd already used that lifeline at some point.  Asking the Audience only resulted in more questions.  This left me with the 50:50, and I had already eliminated "Stork" and "I'll Tell You When You're Older." 

He grinned like a Cheshire cat when he realized he had me pinned and I had to tell him the honest-to-goodness truth.  There's nothing like going over the birds & the bees (and having your Asperger's son realize they have NOTHING to do with the whole situation) while you're putting dishes away out of the dishwasher.

No, we'd had that discussion.  This big discussion was all about money.  Cash.  Moolah.  Dough.

M1 has decided that he wants a Nintendo DS.  Badly.  I have one, and he's going to get it for Christmas though obviously he doesn't know that.  I haven't broken it out in ages, so it's time to pass it on before it dies or becomes obsolete, whichever comes first.  In the electronics world, that's typically about a tie.

Anyway, he is desperate for electronics, and he wanted to know how come he couldn't have A) a cell phone, B) a Nintendo DS, or C) an iPod/computer/Kindle/anything.  Oz and I told him frankly that he couldn't afford them, they were too expensive, and that he would have to wait until he was old enough to buy them himself, and that they are expensive because you are supposed to wait until you're older to have these things.

His world collapsed.  First, he didn't believe that they were expensive, so Oz showed him the price of a Nintendo DS on Amazon, and M1 realized that it'd take him at least six months to save up for one, assuming he got all $25 of his spending money each month, which will happen about the same time Kim Jong Il prances into the White House waving a white flag of peace. 

So that was devastating. 

Then he wanted to know how come he couldn't have a cell phone, and Oz and I about died with suppressed laughter.  We had to explain to him about monthly charges and fees and that our fancy phones that he won't leave alone were about twice the price of a DS and that was *before* the monthly bill.  We told him we'd get him a starter phone when he was 11 or 12.

Tears were imminent. 

And just as he began to really cry, he wailed, "But it's just a PHONE!!!  WHY is it so expensive?!?!?!?"

My thoughts exactly, Son.  My thoughts exactly.

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